My husband works overseas so he barely spends time with the kids. One time I asked my eldest son, what would you like to do with Daddy? “Mag-duyan”, he answered (Ride the swing). Back when my kid was still around one and two years old, we had a swing tied on our Indian Mango tree in front of our yard. That was 2-3 years ago and the swing was already took down because my brother had already built his house there. It’s quite adoring to know that my kid still remembers doing that with his father and would like to do the same thing again.
As parents, we all want to give the best to our kids, provide them with the things and the attention that they need and create a lasting impression to them. However, since these kids are just kids, we do not usually get the admiration and the appreciation that we sometimes long from them. However, you will be surprised with the things that matters and the things that our kids remember about us. My eldest likes making sounds when he’s embracing me or when he wants to cuddle. I guess he got that from me because that is how I approach him when he was little. Unconsciously I would make murmuring sounds as well whenever I would shower him with kisses. My youngest on the other hand would shower himself with kisses from his toy dog, something that I also often do to him whenever its play time. This is how I am reminded of with my kids. How about you? Here are some tips on how to create an impression and make that memory last with your children.
Make them feel safe
Kids will remember you the most in times when you had to comfort them during a bad nightmare or whenever they are afraid of something. They will most likely remember the time that you made them feel safe in your hands. However, they can also remember clearly the time that you lost your temper, hurting them in the process whether physical or emotional, a memory that you would not want your kids to have about you.
Give them your full attention
Parents can be distracted with housework, office work, and other things that may deprive our kids with our full attention. Take time to turn off the television and your smartphone, get out and enjoy a walk in the park with your kids. Forget the pictures that you would later post on social media. Your kid does not care about that yet. They would rather have great memories with you on the park than to have their pictures online when in reality your attention was really not theirs the whole time.
Avoid fights with your spouse in front of your kids
Again, kids can remember the things that made them feel safe or unsafe and stressed. Seeing their parents argue or fight is not a memory you would want them to remember. Show how you care about each other when you are with your kids. This will help your kids define what parents should be – loving, respectful, loyal and happy. This empowers them to look for the same situation when it’s time for them to build a family of their own. See how Doug Kramer always have their kids tagging along whenever he has a surprise for his wife Chezka? Their kids most likely would define love the way they see their parents show love to each other.
It is not enough to avoid cussing and saying “bad words” in front of your children. It is also important to choose the words that you’ll use to discipline and to compliment them. These words will stick longer than you thought they will. Always choose affirming and encouraging words to your children. Always guide your tongue because in the end, you do not have anyone else to blame but yourself when they end up using the same set of words that you use for them.
Teach them to respect family traditions
Christmas time, New Year and other family celebrations should be celebrated with the whole family around if possible. This will not only strengthen your bond but it is also a way to create lasting memories with your children. Family traditions like cuddle time, bedtime stories, going to church and weekend barbeque are some of the family traditions you would want to introduce to your kids as well.
Choose your words, always know your priorities when it comes to your children and make effort to create memories that your kids would truly treasure for a lifetime. Parenting is really not easy, but the rewards of your efforts are worth the challenges and the journey.